Gee, that's a hard question. But I'll tell you the reason why it took me so long to get back here, in dA.

I walked for ten thousand miles, took me 40 days and 40 nights 'til I realised I'm actually thirsty and haven't eaten in days, ate a couple of bugs (and that includes centipedes), got stranded in a deserted island (but don't ask how I got there), stumbled upon igneous rocks, got bitten by hundreds of bees, fell into a puddle of snot, nearly suffocated due to the amount of snot I've consumed, nearly died (but that's an exaggeration), drank a lot of booze (ooh, what kind? nah, I don't drink anything but water. Unless if I had forgotten...), ate a lot of critters (wtf?), then swam the seven seas (or wait, was it six?) and landed on the shores of... the Caribbean. And who would've thought would meet me at the dock? Yeah, that's right. Captain Sparrow. Captain James Sparrow.

And then...

I woke up.

The End.